FEELING
HOPELESS
---Feeling
hopeless is a very bad feeling to feel. It’s a very strange thing to have. Let
us look at it this.
---Hope
comes into being when we want our situation to improve. We usually hope for
some change so our present situation is better than we are perceiving it to be.
Hope is in the future as we wait for something to happen that
will make our now more tolerable.
---If
the now that we are experiencing is very bad AND we have no hope of it ever
improving, we have to say that things are hopeless. The experience of the now
space would be bad if there is something happening in our now that is
unacceptable. These are the two choices that pop out to me - 1] accept the situation that we have found
unacceptable up to now OR 2] make changes to the thing that has caused the
situation to be unacceptable AND bring it into our realm of
acceptability.
---If
things are going well and our experience of NOW is all fine and dandy, than we
have no need to hope. We can actually hope that nothing big happens that makes changes to our now situation. Things can be very contented and if nothing big happens for a time...then that is okay. We hope that nothing happens to upset the apple cart. But, if fear sets in and we begin opposing any change at all and, actually, begin fearing change itself...then it easily can tend toward a form of schizophrenia. If
our now begins to suck and there is little hope that anything will change it, than we can say we feel we are becoming hopeless.
---BUT…if we are sitting back feeling hopeless saying our now sucks and there is nothing that we can do to change that, that is NOT a true statement. We need to reset and eventually look again. Be creative. There are not a whole lot of places that nothing can happen. If we feel hopeless, than we can be sure that fear has a grip somewhere. (Maybe there is something you feel you must confront, but really don't want to.) Something can change the situation. There is a rigidity going on that is preventing the natural ebb and flow from being obvious to you. There REALLY are not a whole lot of hopeless situations where NO CHANGE is possible. We may have to learn to befriend a bit of unpleasantness.
---Shakespeare said, ‘’Expectations are at the ’root’ of all heartache.'' He may have been correct. The outcome that you expect may be the very problem. Maybe, be more flexible + realistic. Maybe you want the outcome to be exactly as you want it to be and are just too controlling of the whole thing.
---BUT…if we are sitting back feeling hopeless saying our now sucks and there is nothing that we can do to change that, that is NOT a true statement. We need to reset and eventually look again. Be creative. There are not a whole lot of places that nothing can happen. If we feel hopeless, than we can be sure that fear has a grip somewhere. (Maybe there is something you feel you must confront, but really don't want to.) Something can change the situation. There is a rigidity going on that is preventing the natural ebb and flow from being obvious to you. There REALLY are not a whole lot of hopeless situations where NO CHANGE is possible. We may have to learn to befriend a bit of unpleasantness.
---Shakespeare said, ‘’Expectations are at the ’root’ of all heartache.'' He may have been correct. The outcome that you expect may be the very problem. Maybe, be more flexible + realistic. Maybe you want the outcome to be exactly as you want it to be and are just too controlling of the whole thing.
Here is a kind of silly, but poignant SONG by Paul Simon that may lighten things up for you.
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