THINKING BACK...
THE ROOT CANALS
---This was a time that was a bit ''mind-blowing'' when I think of it. I recall having had either two or three root canals withOUT any kind of pain defering agent [Novocain, laughing gas, etc.] It was me, the dentist, the hygienist and of course, the drill. This occurred in 1978.
---It was after my Enlightening experience in Oct. 1976, when I had the ''Realization'' that God was Love and IT is all about Love. I had quit my ''job'' as a comedian in nightclubs and was now being a Jesuit Candidate. I remember that I had saved a few hundred dollars and was paying the Dentist 30 dollars per month.
---This was done over several ''visits.'' The Dentist would drill and drill, and I would kind of ''watch'' him do it. I was very Objective to the experience. I also remember this. I wondered if this is what Jesus did when his hands were being nailed to the cross. It was certainly ''interesting.'' I could feel the Dentist working, but didn't feel any accompanying pain. I was perched above it and just watched and waited until he was through. I remember him 'removing' the nerve and everything.
On another time having the same procedure, I felt a bit 'guilty' at not experiencing pain. I felt that Jesus must have had pain during the nailing experience, so I decided that I should feel pain. Now I am NOT going to make the claim either way that Jesus did or didn't feel pain. It was almost too easy not feeling pain and staying Objective.
---At this time I decided to ''go'' with the situation. I became ''one-with'' the pain. It took a small amount of time to get in rhythm with the Dentist, but I was moving with the drill and ''going'' with it. It was so painful that it was not painful. It was like an automatic transcendence of the pain. I remember thinking, ''Oh I see. You can do this also.'' My own nonchalance cracks me up.
---The Dentist then asked, and it took me by surprise. ''How do you do this? I'm drilling away and you remain so calm.''
---I wasn't quite sure of how to answer. But having been known for my quickness as an ad lib comedian and a need to please, I immediately said, ''Oh...I pray.'' This is what I felt God would want me to say. I was more unsure what I was doing and saying - at that time (as you can, probably, tell.). I guess technically it was more of a Contemplative Meditation with a Christian theme, but I am just not that pedantic. The Dentist said, ''maybe I should try that''.
---I also remember that on the ride home, I wondered and yes, ''worried,'' if I had told him the Truth or not. I would get hung-up on semantics over the strangest things. When I think back to that time, I am sure that ''praying'' got the point across.
---As my Creative writing teacher used to say, ''Paul, you get too Heavy-Handed.'' I would write stories and to be sure readers ''got'' it, I would add a Moral.
So to my teacher I say, ''I believe we can ALL do this with pain. It is a matter of being Objective instead of Subjective.'' I think that running from pain causes pain
and acceptance of pain is more conducive to my experience. Medications tend to ''buffer'' the zone between acceptance and non-acceptance, and are another way we run. I will admit that I also don't enjoy seeing people suffer. My friend Bob Johnson had once said over a similar issue, ''How many people can do that?'' In my People-Pleasing style, I agreed with him, but I still believe we ALL can.
---The above is a True story. I am not quite sure I could articulate the relationship between pleasure-pain and fear [the avoiding or running from], and how it relates to Joy and Love in as much detail as I can now, but nonetheless, I was somehow doing this. Be Well.
THE ROOT CANALS
---This was a time that was a bit ''mind-blowing'' when I think of it. I recall having had either two or three root canals withOUT any kind of pain defering agent [Novocain, laughing gas, etc.] It was me, the dentist, the hygienist and of course, the drill. This occurred in 1978.
---It was after my Enlightening experience in Oct. 1976, when I had the ''Realization'' that God was Love and IT is all about Love. I had quit my ''job'' as a comedian in nightclubs and was now being a Jesuit Candidate. I remember that I had saved a few hundred dollars and was paying the Dentist 30 dollars per month.
---This was done over several ''visits.'' The Dentist would drill and drill, and I would kind of ''watch'' him do it. I was very Objective to the experience. I also remember this. I wondered if this is what Jesus did when his hands were being nailed to the cross. It was certainly ''interesting.'' I could feel the Dentist working, but didn't feel any accompanying pain. I was perched above it and just watched and waited until he was through. I remember him 'removing' the nerve and everything.
On another time having the same procedure, I felt a bit 'guilty' at not experiencing pain. I felt that Jesus must have had pain during the nailing experience, so I decided that I should feel pain. Now I am NOT going to make the claim either way that Jesus did or didn't feel pain. It was almost too easy not feeling pain and staying Objective.
---At this time I decided to ''go'' with the situation. I became ''one-with'' the pain. It took a small amount of time to get in rhythm with the Dentist, but I was moving with the drill and ''going'' with it. It was so painful that it was not painful. It was like an automatic transcendence of the pain. I remember thinking, ''Oh I see. You can do this also.'' My own nonchalance cracks me up.
---The Dentist then asked, and it took me by surprise. ''How do you do this? I'm drilling away and you remain so calm.''
---I wasn't quite sure of how to answer. But having been known for my quickness as an ad lib comedian and a need to please, I immediately said, ''Oh...I pray.'' This is what I felt God would want me to say. I was more unsure what I was doing and saying - at that time (as you can, probably, tell.). I guess technically it was more of a Contemplative Meditation with a Christian theme, but I am just not that pedantic. The Dentist said, ''maybe I should try that''.
---I also remember that on the ride home, I wondered and yes, ''worried,'' if I had told him the Truth or not. I would get hung-up on semantics over the strangest things. When I think back to that time, I am sure that ''praying'' got the point across.
---As my Creative writing teacher used to say, ''Paul, you get too Heavy-Handed.'' I would write stories and to be sure readers ''got'' it, I would add a Moral.
So to my teacher I say, ''I believe we can ALL do this with pain. It is a matter of being Objective instead of Subjective.'' I think that running from pain causes pain
and acceptance of pain is more conducive to my experience. Medications tend to ''buffer'' the zone between acceptance and non-acceptance, and are another way we run. I will admit that I also don't enjoy seeing people suffer. My friend Bob Johnson had once said over a similar issue, ''How many people can do that?'' In my People-Pleasing style, I agreed with him, but I still believe we ALL can.
---The above is a True story. I am not quite sure I could articulate the relationship between pleasure-pain and fear [the avoiding or running from], and how it relates to Joy and Love in as much detail as I can now, but nonetheless, I was somehow doing this. Be Well.
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